Spiritual Growth

When Letting Go Feels Like Losing Control

When Letting Go Feels Like Losing Control

Surrender isn’t waving a white flag in defeat—it’s choosing trust over control. In a world that glorifies hustle and hyper-independence, the call to “let go and let God” sounds like foolishness. But God’s pace often begins where ours ends. In this post, you’ll reflect on how surrendering your own plans doesn’t mean giving up—it means stepping into the peace that only comes when God leads. Share a moment from your own story when surrender led to unexpected peace.

When the Outcome Isn’t What You Expected

You obeyed.
You prayed.
You trusted.
And then… it didn’t turn out the way you imagined.

What do you do when obedience doesn’t lead to the outcome you hoped for?

Maybe the ministry didn’t grow.
Maybe the relationship didn’t heal.
Maybe the opportunity closed.
Maybe you felt alone in your yes.

It’s in these moments we find out what our obedience was really rooted in.

“Obedience is not a transaction; it’s a transformation. God isn’t after results. He’s after your heart.”
A Pace of Grace, Chapter 5

Sometimes we obey hoping it will produce something visible—something we can measure. But God is often doing something invisible.
Something eternal.

He’s forming you.
Training your trust.
Building your endurance.
And teaching you how to walk by faith, not by outcome.

“God isn’t only working through your obedience—He’s working in you as you obey.”

The fruit may not look like what you expected.
But that doesn’t mean your yes was wasted.

You never know what God is protecting you from, preparing you for, or producing behind the scenes.

So don’t let a disappointing outcome convince you that God didn’t move.
He did.
He is.
And He will.

Because obedience that honors Him always bears fruit.
Even if it takes a while to see.

Reflect + Respond:

  • Has obedience ever led you somewhere unexpected?

  • What did you learn about God—or about yourself—in that process?

Don’t measure the worth of your obedience by the size of the outcome.
Measure it by the nearness of your Savior.

Scripture for the Week:

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.”
—Proverbs 3:5–6 (NIV)

💛 From the Pages of A Pace of Grace

This post wraps up our August Called series, inspired by Chapter 5 of my upcoming book, A Pace of Grace.
Because grace doesn’t always show up in the result—
Sometimes, it shows up in the middle of your yes.

Coming February 2026 from Leafwood Publishers.

Small Steps, Big Faith

We often think of calling as this big, dramatic, spotlight moment.
A lightning bolt from heaven.
A stage. A mission. A moment of total clarity.

But more often?
It starts with something small.

One faithful yes.
One hard conversation.
One decision to show up when no one’s watching.

“Faithfulness in the small things trains us to recognize God’s voice in the big things.”
A Pace of Grace, Chapter 5

Sometimes we miss God’s invitation because we’re waiting for it to feel bigger.
But obedience isn’t measured by how flashy it looks.
It’s measured by faith.

I think about Nehemiah.
He didn’t start by building a wall.
He started by weeping for his people and asking the king for permission to help.
Before he ever held a tool, he held a burden—and obeyed one step at a time.

God isn’t just calling us to “do big things.”
He’s calling us to be faithful in the little things—
because that’s how He builds something lasting.

“Sometimes God’s plan doesn’t feel significant until you look back and see the pattern of small yeses stacked like stones of faith.”

When you feel overlooked, underestimated, or like what you’re doing isn’t enough—
Remember: small obedience still matters.
God sees it.
He blesses it.
And He builds something holy through it.

Reflect + Respond:

  • What small step is God asking you to take this week?

  • Are you overlooking something small because it doesn’t feel “important enough”?

Ask the Holy Spirit to show you what faithfulness looks like today. Then, trust Him with tomorrow.

Scripture for the Week:

“Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much…”
—Luke 16:10 (NIV)

💛 From the Pages of A Pace of Grace

This week’s post is shaped by Chapter 5 of my upcoming book, A Pace of Grace.
Because faithfulness isn’t always about what we do—it’s about who we’re becoming in the process.
Coming February 2026 from Leafwood Publishers.

Tenacious Grace: When Obedience Feels Costly

There’s a kind of obedience that feels light and joy-filled—like a deep breath of peace. But then there’s the other kind. The kind that stretches you. Costs you. Presses against your comfort zone and makes you wonder if you really heard God right.

That’s what I call Tenacious Grace—the grace that helps you keep saying yes when your yes feels risky or unclear.

“Obedience isn’t about having it all together. It’s about saying yes even when it’s hard. Even when it costs us something. Tenacious grace is the grace that helps you keep showing up, keep believing, and keep saying yes.”
A Pace of Grace, Chapter 5

Over the years, I’ve learned something about this kind of obedience: it rarely comes with a roadmap. It usually comes with a whisper.

And that whisper? It’s quiet, but steady. Persistent. It nudges you when you’d rather stay still. It draws you toward people, places, or decisions that feel just a little too big for your current strength. It’s the kind of invitation that almost always feels inconvenient—but undeniably holy.

I’ve walked into assignments that made zero sense on paper, but were confirmed by God again and again through His Word, His Spirit, and the fruit that followed. And while there have been tears, nerves, and moments where I felt unqualified, there’s also been deep joy—the kind that can only be found when you’re exactly where He wants you.

“God isn’t testing your strength. He’s training your trust.”

Tenacious grace is what holds you steady when you say yes and everything gets harder before it gets better. It’s the reminder that God didn’t ask for perfection—He asked for surrender. And even the smallest act of obedience can turn into a move of God you never saw coming.

If God’s asking you to do something that feels bigger than you, I want to remind you of this: obedience isn’t always convenient, but it is always worth it.

And when it feels costly? That’s often a sign that it’s building something eternal.

Reflect + Respond:

  • Where is God asking you to take a brave step of obedience right now?

  • What’s holding you back?

  • What would it look like to trust Him more than your comfort?

Take a moment to journal or pray over those questions—and then, say yes.

Scripture for the Week:

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”
—Romans 8:28 (NIV)

💛 From the Pages of A Pace of Grace

This post was inspired by Chapter 5 of my upcoming book, A Pace of Grace: Steady Your Spirit When Life Gets Messy.
If you’ve ever wondered how to stay grounded, trust God’s leading, and find joy in obedience—this book was written for you.

Coming February 2026 from Leafwood Publishers.
Stay tuned for more sneak peeks this fall!

Discerning God’s Call in Real Life

There’s this old quote from F.B. Meyer that says,

“God’s impressions within and His Word without are always corroborated by His providence around, and we should quietly wait until these three focus into one point… You will become so sure that you are right, when God’s three witnesses concur, that you could not be surer though an angel beckoned you.”

I’ve got to be honest—I’m not sure I’ve ever seen glowworms light my path (like Meyer suggests), but I have seen God's confirmation show up in the most surprising and sacred ways.

Through my time in ministry, I’ve never been more confident in recognizing the voice and movement of God. That’s not to say I never question or wrestle with uncertainty—because I do. There are still days when the next step feels foggy. But when I know… I know. And it’s unmistakable.

I’ve been blessed with a team who sees the fruit when I take the steps God puts on my heart. I’ve had people encourage me even when it doesn’t make sense in the moment—only to watch it all come together in ways we never could’ve orchestrated ourselves.

It’s those moments that leave me in awe all over again.

Isn’t it amazing how, when we take a step of obedience—trusting that it was God who nudged us—we start seeing that same message in Scripture, hearing it in conversation, getting asked the very questions we’ve been praying about? And then, as if out of nowhere, God moves powerfully, gently confirming, “Yes, this was Me.”

That’s what F.B. Meyer was getting at. God speaks through His Word, through His Spirit within us, and through the circumstances around us. When all three line up, it’s like a divine spotlight on the path ahead.

God’s impressions within and His Word without are always corroborated by His providence around, and we should quietly wait until these three focus into one point… You will become so sure that you are right, when God’s three witnesses concur, that you could not be surer though an angel beckoned you.
— F.B. Meyer

But here’s the challenge:
We won’t always be able to explain it.
It won’t always make sense at first.
It might even look a little “weird” to others.

That doesn’t mean we’re wrong.
It just means we’re walking by faith.

So let’s not be so focused on figuring out how the story ends that we miss the step-by-step beauty of what God is doing. Let’s not cling so tightly to our own plans that we overlook His unfolding one. Because He isn’t just working through the outcome—He’s forming us through the process.

God is raising up people—women like you and me—with a call that may look different than expected, but is deeply rooted in His heart and His Word. We don’t need to have all the answers. We need only to surrender, listen, and obey. The same God who calls will carry it to completion.

So if you’re in a place of wondering whether you heard Him right—pause. Pray. Get in the Word. Seek wise counsel. Watch what God does. His fingerprints are often all over the thing we weren’t even sure about.

And when those three witnesses—His voice within, His Word without, and His providence around—start to align… move forward in faith.

You may not see glowworms lighting the way,
but you will see His glory.

This post kicks off our August blog series: "Called."
Whether you're just beginning to wonder what your calling is, in the thick of obeying a word that doesn’t make sense yet, or waiting for confirmation—it’s for you.

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📖 Follow me on Instagram @HeyHeatherCook

📬 Preorder news for my book - coming soon!

How to Actually Live Rooted in Christ (Even When Life Is a Lot)

We’ve all heard it: “Just stay rooted in Christ.”

But what does that actually mean when your toddler is melting down, your inbox is overflowing, and your brain feels like a browser with 37 tabs open?

It’s a beautiful phrase—rooted in Christ—but sometimes it feels a little abstract, especially when life is loud, busy, or just plain overwhelming.

So let’s make it practical. Because staying rooted isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being connected.

The Deep Need to Be Grounded

I’ve lived untethered before. Running on caffeine, chasing approval, performing for acceptance. On the outside? I looked “put together.” On the inside? I was spiraling.

It wasn’t until everything around me started shaking that I realized… I had no roots. My identity had been tangled up in doing, striving, and keeping it all together.

And that’s when God gently brought me back to the beginning: Who I am in Him.

Real Roots Can Withstand Real Life

Think about a tree during a storm. The winds blow, the rain pours, the sky turns gray… but the tree stays. Why? Because its roots go deep.

If we want to withstand the stress, chaos, and overwhelm of life—we need to be rooted not in ourselves, but in Christ. That kind of spiritual grounding doesn’t mean the storm won’t come. It just means you won’t be uprooted by it.

What Does It Look Like to Be Rooted?

Let’s take it out of the clouds and bring it down to real life.

Here’s how I practice living rooted in Christ, even when life is a lot:

1. I Let Scripture Define Me—Not My Feelings

Feelings are real. But they aren’t always true. When I’m overwhelmed, I return to what God says about me:

“You are loved.”

“You are chosen.”

“You are created on purpose.”

“You are held.”

These aren’t just verses—they’re anchors. And they keep me grounded when life feels shaky.

2. I Make Time for Stillness (Even in Small Moments)

Some days I get 15 minutes with my Bible and coffee. Other days it’s a whispered prayer in the car line.

Stillness isn’t about the length of time. It’s about intentional space to remember who I belong to.

Be still and know that I am God.
— Psalm 46:10

Even one minute of stillness can reset my spirit and re-root me in Him.

3. I Let Go of the Pressure to Prove

Performance-based faith is exhausting. It makes us believe we have to earn our way into God’s love.

But here’s the truth: God already loves you. You don’t have to earn what’s already been given.

Living rooted in Christ means letting go of the pressure to prove and receiving the grace to simply be.


4. I Stay Connected to People Who Remind Me of Truth

When I’m tired or overwhelmed, I need friends who say: “Hey, you’re okay. God’s got you.” “You don’t have to do it all.” “You’re still loved, even on hard days.”

Community is part of staying rooted. We weren’t meant to grow alone.

5. I Keep Coming Back

Even when I mess up. Even when I forget. Even when I drift.

I come back. That’s what grace is for.

Being rooted isn’t about never wavering—it’s about returning to the Source again and again.

Final Thought

You don’t have to be perfect to be planted.

Rooted doesn’t mean you always feel strong. It means you know where your strength comes from.

When you’re grounded in God’s truth, you can withstand the chaos, the burnout, the identity struggles—and still know exactly who you are and whose you are.

So if life feels like a lot right now? Let it be your cue to dig deeper. Not into performance. But into the peace that only comes from being rooted in Christ.


This blog wraps up our July series based on Chapter 1 of my upcoming book, A Pace of Grace. If your soul is craving rest, identity, and a rhythm that actually works, I’d love to walk this journey with you.

💛 Subscribe to my email list

📖 Follow me on Instagram @HeyHeatherCook

📬 Preorder news coming soon!

Let’s grow deep roots—together.

From Anxious to Anchored: When Your Soul Cries Out for Stillness

I’ve battled anxiety for as long as I can remember.

Sometimes it shows up loud—like a racing heart, a clenched jaw, a full-blown panic attack when everything feels out of control.

Other times, it’s quiet—a simmering undercurrent of tension in my chest or the mental loop whispering, “You’re behind. You’re failing. You have to do more.”

But somewhere along the way, I realized something: Anxiety is often my soul’s way of waving a white flag.

It’s not always a sign that I’m broken. Sometimes, it’s a signal that I’ve been running too hard for too long.

It’s my inner spirit crying out: “I need stillness. I need peace. I need Jesus.”

The World Moves Fast—But You Don’t Have To

We live in a culture that celebrates hustle and busyness, that claps for overcommitment and calls rest “lazy.”

So when we feel anxious or burnt out, we assume we’re the problem. That if we could just try harder or plan better, we’d feel peace.

But friend, peace isn’t something we achieve by doing more. It’s something we receive by drawing near.

Be still, and know that I am God.
— Psalm 46:10

That verse isn’t only a cute coffee mug quote. It’s an invitation. To stop. To breathe. To anchor your soul in something stronger than the chaos.


What’s Actually Beneath the Anxiety?

When anxiety spikes in my life, it’s usually because I’m holding something too tightly:

– Control

– Expectations

– People’s opinions

– My plans for the future

It’s a form of striving. And striving disconnects me from God’s pace.

It convinces me that I need to hustle to hold it all together.But that’s not our job.

We are held by the One who holds the world.

Anchored in God’s Presence.

When anxiety rises, I’m learning to see it as a holy signal. A sacred nudge that says: “Pause here. Be with Me.”

Stillness is the antidote to soul-anxiety—not just a break in your schedule, but a posture of the heart.

Here’s how I anchor my anxious heart back to peace:

1. Breathe + Name It

When anxiety rises, I pause. Even for 30 seconds. I take a deep breath and name what I’m carrying.

“God, I feel overwhelmed because…”

“God, I’m scared of…”

“God, I don’t know what to do about…”

And then I exhale and say,

“But I trust You with it.”

2. Speak Truth Over the Spiral

“I am not alone.”

“I am fully known and fully loved.”

“God is my refuge and strength.”

“He goes before me.”

These aren’t just affirmations. They’re anchors.

The more I speak them, the more they steady me.

3. Pursue Stillness, Even in Small Moments

Sometimes I get 15 minutes to sit outside with my Bible and coffee.

Sometimes I get 1 minute in my car before the next pickup.

But I take what I can get—and I give that moment to God.

Even a few quiet breaths can anchor your heart back to Him.

4. Let Anxiety Drive You to Jesus

Instead of letting anxiety spiral me into self-reliance, I try to let it push me into surrender.

Lord, I can’t carry this.

But You can.

Help me trust You here.

Anchored Doesn’t Mean Unshaken

I still have anxious moments. Still get overwhelmed. Still forget to pause and spiral instead.

But what I’ve learned is this: Being anchored in Jesus doesn’t mean we’ll never feel anxious. It means we have a place to go when we do.

A place of stillness. A place of truth. A place where we can stop performing and just be—fully known, fully loved.

That place? It’s always open. We just have to pause long enough to enter it.

Final Thought

If you feel anxious right now, can I tell you something?

You’re not weak. You’re not a failure. You’re not too much.

You’re just tired. And that’s okay.

Let your anxiety lead you—not into more striving—but into the stillness of God’s presence.

You’re already held. Already loved. Already enough.


Need more soul-deep encouragement like this?

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→ Read more in A Pace of Grace—coming February 2026

You don’t have to live in chaos. Let’s steady our spirits together. 💛

Your Identity Isn’t What You Do—It’s Who You Belong To

There’s a strange pressure we carry—especially as women—to be everything.

We’re the mom, the wife, the organizer, the friend, the helper, the encourager, the one who remembers snacks and birthdays and the field trip form that somehow disappeared in the abyss of the school backpack.

And even if you’re not in a season of motherhood, there’s still that pressure: To succeed. To stay busy. To always be “on.”

But here’s the hard truth I had to learn (and still re-learn every day):

I am not what I do. And neither are you.

The Labels That Weigh Us Down

I used to measure my worth by my productivity. I felt more valuable when I was performing, when I had something to show for my day. But that’s a heavy way to live.

At some point, my identity became tangled in titles and expectations: “Pastor.” “Good mom.” “Reliable friend.” “Successful woman.” And when I wasn’t living up to those labels? I felt like I didn’t even know who I was anymore.

Have you ever felt that way?

The world is quick to hand us labels. But most of them are based on performance. And God? He never asked us to earn our identity. He simply gave it.

What God Says About Who You Are

Let’s clear this up: your identity isn’t rooted in what others say about you, or even what you say about you.

It’s rooted in what God has already declared. “You are my daughter. You are loved. You are chosen. You are not your past, not your pain, and not your perfection.”

He knew exactly what He was doing when He created you. Psalm 139 says you are “fearfully and wonderfully made.” Ephesians 2:10 says you were created on purpose for a purpose. That’s not just a motivational quote—that’s a truth to build your life on.

The Problem with Performance-Based Identity

When we base our identity on what we do, our confidence will always rise and fall with how we’re performing.

Bad day = bad identity.

Good day = temporary confidence boost.

It’s a rollercoaster. And it’s exhausting. But identity rooted in Christ is different. It doesn’t change when life does. It’s unshakable. It’s not threatened by failure. It’s not inflated by applause. It’s secure because it’s grounded in who we belong to.

So How Do We Stay Rooted in That Truth?

Here are a few ways I keep coming back to my true identity:

1. Speak Scripture Over Yourself

Daily affirmations aren’t just a trend. They’re spiritual warfare.

“I am a child of God.” (John 1:12)

“I am fully known and fully loved.” (Romans 8:38–39)

“I am a new creation.” (2 Corinthians 5:17)

“I am God’s masterpiece.” (Ephesians 2:10)

Keep these on your mirror. Write them in your journal. Speak them out loud until your heart believes what your mind already knows.

2. Release the Masks

You don’t have to be a different version of yourself depending on the room you’re in.

You’re allowed to show up as your whole, honest, imperfect self.

God doesn’t bless who we pretend to be—He blesses who we actually are.

3. Lean Into Community

Find people who speak truth over you when you forget. We all need voices that remind us:

“You’re not alone. You’re not too much. You’re not failing. You’re God’s beloved.”

Surround yourself with people who help you take off the pressure and put on peace.

Final Thought

You are not what you do. You are not what others think. You are not how productive your day was. You are not defined by your past or your pain.

You are loved. You are chosen. You are seen. You are HIS. That’s the only identity that will hold when life starts shaking.

This blog is part of a July series based on Chapter 1 of my book, A Pace of Grace. I wrote it for the woman who’s tired of chasing peace and never quite finding it.

Let’s stop hustling for approval and start resting in the grace we’ve already been given.

💛 Preorder details coming soon

📖 Subscribe to my email list for more encouragement

📲 Follow me on Instagram @HeyHeatherCook

When You Feel Rushed, Remember This

The Lord is my shepherd… He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul.
— Psalm 23:1–3

Ever feel like you’re racing through summer instead of resting in it?

Between keeping up with routines (or the lack of them), trying to make memories, managing the heat, and balancing your own needs with everyone else’s—it’s easy to feel like you’re just trying to keep up.

But here’s a gentle truth: God never rushes us.

He doesn’t push or prod. He leads. He walks. And He knows exactly what you need—not just to get through the day, but to be restored within it.

If you’re feeling rushed, overwhelmed, or running on empty, this is your invitation to pause. To remember that you weren’t made to move at the speed of culture. You were made to follow the pace of the Shepherd.

The same God who created galaxies also created margin. The same Jesus who healed the crowds also withdrew to rest. And the same Spirit that raised Christ from the dead dwells in you—even on your busiest days.

So if all you can manage this week is a whispered, “Jesus, slow me down,”—that’s enough.

Stillness isn’t always situational. It’s spiritual. And peace doesn’t come from a perfect calendar. It comes from walking closely with the One who restores your soul.

Slow-Down Spiritual Practice: Breath Prayer

Find a quiet moment—even in your car or while folding laundry—and pray with your breath:

Inhale: “The Lord is my Shepherd…”

Exhale: “…I lack nothing.”

Repeat it slowly 3–5 times.

Let the truth of His presence slow your heart and steady your soul.

Sabbath Rhythms for the Summer Soul

In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength.
— Isaiah 30:15

The word “Sabbath” might stir up images of quiet Sundays, unplugged afternoons, or a peaceful day at church. But in reality? Summer Sabbaths can look more like kid chaos, sports tournaments, and last-minute BBQs. Not exactly restful.

But here’s the thing: Sabbath isn’t just a command—it’s a gift.

It’s not a rule to follow, but a rhythm to receive.

Sabbath isn’t just sitting still all day; it’s about stopping—even briefly—to remind your soul that you are not defined by how much you do. It’s a holy pause that says, “God, I trust You to hold everything, even while I rest.”

Summer can make this rhythm feel messy. But what if we gave ourselves permission to practice it imperfectly?

Maybe it looks like sleeping in one Saturday a month. Maybe it’s a no-laundry Sunday. Maybe it’s turning your phone off for an hour and playing cards in the living room.

Sabbath is less about a rulebook and more about realigning with the pace of grace. Your soul was never meant to run at full speed all the time. This summer, let Sabbath be a gentle reminder that God is your rest, not your schedule.

Slow-Down Spiritual Practice: Create a “Mini Sabbath”

Pick one evening this week to rest with intention.

Turn off your phone, light a candle, play worship music, and do something life-giving: take a walk, read, journal, or simply be still.

Ask: “What would bring rest to my body and delight to my soul tonight?”

Then do that—without guilt.